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Old 01-06-2012, 06:01 AM   #1
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Drysdale's Avatar
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 20,628
Default Electric Cars

Saw this in a thread on Gizmodo, and thought it was funny enough to share:

Ok son, sit down. It's time for "the talk". Your mother disagrees, but I think you're already old enough to know where electricity comes from. You see, when a male Pikachu and a female Pikachu love each other very much, they pick a nice place to settle down, build a nest and, after a tiresome ritual involving Karate, volcanic ashes and whale penis leather, finally lay an egg. This egg, which contains a baby Pichu, is taken care of with much love and care and when it finally hatches the baby Pichu is harvested by a cold unfeeling machine, squeezed and drained of all of its sweet, sweet electricity, while its mortal coil is converted into hats and gloves and panties with lightning tails on them.
The electricity is then magickally placed into batteries, by highly trained wizards, the very best Hogwarts has to offer, and these batteries are then shipped to your car via miracles and magnets, even though no one really knows how they work. Once in your car, they are finally ready to provide infinite, clean, magick energy FOR 10 YEARS of incredible imaginary journeys of eternal engines, AIDS and cooked meat.
It's a beautiful cycle, this one, despite all the naysayers saying electricity actually comes from coal and oil and other things that burn in power plants. No, that's exactly what the man wants us to believe, but we don't, instead we spread the truth as told by our masters from planets PX9.
Now go to bed, and don't forget your aluminum foil helmet.
(Edit comment)
"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects."
-Robert A. Heinlein

"Thou shalt not steal. Except by majority vote." - Gary North
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