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Old 05-23-2002, 04:39 AM   #1
Supa Fly
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Default The WORST things you can say to an Occifer of the Law


Yes, I said Occifer.


The ABSOLUTE WORST things to say to a police occifer:

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my (NA) beer.

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged
in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me!
Good job!

5. Excuse me. Is "stick up" hyphenated?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition
to be a police officer.

7. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school
instead.

8. Bad cop! No donut!

9. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

10. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on Cops ?

11. You look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend's
nightstand.

12. I pay your salary!

13. So, duhhhh, you on the take, or what?

14. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a
warning too.

15. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

16. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no
other car around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

17. What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're the trained
specialist.

18. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell
off my lap and got lodged between the brake and the gas pedals,
forcing me to speed out of control.

19. Hey, is that a 9 mm? That's nothing compared to this .44 magnum.

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Old 05-23-2002, 09:54 PM   #2
Azraelwrath
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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!

You gotta be either dumb, drunk, high or a combination of any to say that kind of stuff.
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Old 05-24-2002, 06:18 PM   #3
Largar
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wooo

Definetly gonna use this one after I get my next speeding ticket:

Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

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Old 05-24-2002, 07:12 PM   #4
Grottnikk
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One of the BEST things you can say to an officer:

Cop: Where's the fire, ma'am?

Woman: In your eyes, officer....



One of the WORST things you can say to an officer:

Cop: Where's the fire, boy?

Guy: In your eyes, officer....
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Old 05-24-2002, 09:26 PM   #5
Pankeleonn
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Wanna do the worst thing ever to a cop? Just act out "Dead man on campus"

Driver to passenger - "ask this nice officer where I 95 is"
(they pull up to an officer in a car)
Passenger - "excuse me sir but...."
Driver - "DO I SMELL BACON, HERE PIGGY PIGGY PIGGY....."
(Driver drives off)
(driver pulls out a gun from the glove compartment and says "they don't like it when you do this" and proceedes to shoot at the cop"
Passenger - "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

One of the best worst movies you'll ever see.... RENT IT!
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Old 05-26-2002, 08:21 AM   #6
fire1222
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...

"I'M SORRY MA'AM I REALLY HAD TO @#%$ BAD SO I WAS SPEEDING EVEN THOUGH THERE'S A BATHROOM WHERE YOU PULLED ME OVER BUT i"M NOT GOING TO USE IT!"
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Old 05-31-2002, 04:39 PM   #7
Skeletal Aggravation
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Default Occifer of da law


"I'm sorry occifer, I'm not as think as you drunk I am."
!
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Old 05-31-2002, 06:52 PM   #8
Blytzz
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Default Re: Occifer of da law


"occifer"......quite possibly the worst mispelling of the word "officer" ever
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Old 06-03-2002, 09:55 AM   #9
Skeletal Aggravation
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Default /Cough


Intentional
:eek:
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Old 06-04-2002, 03:47 AM   #10
Keldarn
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Default Re: Occifer of da law


"I'm sorry occifer, I'm not as think as you drunk I am."
Reminds me of:

Occifer, I'm not as thunk as you drink I am! I can straight a walk line anytime...ah hell, take me drunk, I'm home.
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Old 06-04-2002, 09:45 PM   #11
Mdar kelf
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Default Re: Occifer of da law


once heard of a great way to screw with cops.
Say you get pulled over for speeding,
You convince the cop that you have no license, the car is stolen, there is a gun in the glove box, and the owner is stuffed in the trunk..
theofficer calls for back up.
When the others get there you cooperate with whomever is in charge. Show them license and registration, insurance, show them that there is no gun nor dead body..

And when they ask what is going on. you say, "I bet the bastard also said I was speeding too"

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Old 06-07-2002, 11:58 PM   #12
Greell the druid
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Default Re: Occifer of da law


18. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell
off my lap and got lodged between the brake and the gas pedals,
forcing me to speed out of control.



classic.

~Greell~
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